Hello. You can call me James, or call me Jimmy, just don’t call me late for a morning tee time in the summer.
I’m not good at golf. No bueno. Otnay oodgay for those who speak Pig Latin. (Did that go the way of cursive writing? I don’t want to know). I’m the kind of not good where the course marshal slows down just to watch, drivers slow down when passing on the highway, wildlife run for their lives, birds actually quit singing. You know what I mean.
In all seriousness I do occasionally break 90 on a decent muni course, I’ve shot an 88 on a straightforward par 71 course, (from the whites, not the tips you lunatics), an 81 on a par 65, so I have my small moments. But I am still very capable of hitting a 107 (just did 2 weeks ago). So I’m like 95% of us meatballs out here who spend a ridiculous amount of our hard-earned dough to raise our blood pressure in search of that one hole where we put it all together, reach a par 5 in two with 35 feet to go, dream of the eagle putt dropping, and proceed to 4 putt ourselves to the bottom of a bottle of whatever after the round. And I… Just. Can’t. Stop.
And so was born, Wormburner Weekly. A publication designed for the rest of us, the majority of us: the hacker, weekend warrior, the duffer, the wormburnin’, chili dippin’, sky ballin’ wastes of golf space laying ruin to the high grass (did you think I’d say fairways? Who you crappin’?) on municipal golf courses all over the globe.
The worm ducking the flaming golf ball in our logo? That’s Winston. He’s having a worse round than you.
Here we recap the latest tour event, pointing out highs and lows like your golf buddy would. We celebrate the world’s best having their worst moments on the links with the Worm of the Week, to remind us even the greats want to snap a wedge over their knee on occasion. We dispense golf tips we have absolutely no right to give, share some knowledge of the history of the game and tell a funny joke (once every five issues, maybe). Throw in a little Draft Kings fun and a lot of color and you have our humble newsletter. Our website includes a shop (coming soon), suggestions for gear, and blog posts about all things golf, and golf tangent.
Subscribe here to get the most disreputable newsletter in golf for free. Every Tuesday. For hackers who love the game more than their handicap indicates they should. Your game won’t improve. But your Tuesdays will.